All posts by Sukhdev Kaur

Trainings

At the Dharamsaal International School of Kundalini Yoga and Humanology we offer you several different trainings locally and internationally, to serve your spiritual and professional growth:


Level 1 Kundalini yoga Teacher Training ESTONIA ( in estonian / in english)

Level 1 Kundalini yoga Teacher Training LATVIA (in latvian / in english)

Level 2 Kundalini yoga Teacher Training LATVIA/ESTONIA

Level 3 Kundalini yoga Teacher Training course 21 Stages of Meditation

Sacred Woman, Infinite Mother: Pregnancy, Birth and Postpartum yoga Teacher Training

In Partnership with:

Karam Kriya School
Kundalini Research Institute
Guru Ram Das Institute & Ashram

Dharamsaal organizes Kundalini yoga teacher trainings under Kundalini Research Institute with Sukhdev Kaur as Lead trainer for:

International member of:

Hold the void

There is an indescribable beauty and sweetness to separation. Be it death, longing, a short departure, it is a very poetic realm of separation that lives and relives every time a situation like this happens. Numerologically speaking, this is the realm of number 2: tension, longing, missing, absence, abyss, black, blues, emotion, organic…
The most beautiful part of that longing is the re-union. It is a joy beyond joys, a fulfillment that impregnates the heart with an infinite love. For this to happen there needs to be a separation. There is no other way.
When we often say goodbye, when we come to visit to Canada or Mexico, My parents always say “in order to meet again, we must leave”. This is just as true as it gets.
That sweetness of leaving implies a void, a fear of using that emptiness inside: “how can I be empty? What will happen to me? How can I fill it as quick as possible?” This is the first reaction of the human. Yet the art of pressing that sweetness from the emptiness is to hold that space of void. To pause. To meditate and contemplate that sacredness, that tension, that separation.
Hold it.
It won’t kill you.
It will make you stronger.
Hold it.
Don’t rush.
Hold it.
Stay still.
Be.
You will receive the treasure hidden behind it all.
And only then a reunion will happen. And the heart will be fulfilled once more, with a nectar so sweet it will pour out from every single one of your pores. If you just stay still.

In gratitude,
Sukhdev Kaur

God is great (in other words, waheguru!)

Dear family,

I am amazed at the human heart. I’m just coming out of two very challenging days, full of stressful moments. This being a long story full of details, I will cut it short.
Two days ago I found myself in an awkward situation, where a training that I’m organizing was about to be cancelled 3 times. The reasons being different, I was concerned the most for the commitment I made all these participants on prices and resources. A big ugly misunderstanding came across, which demanded everybody to pay much more than what we had agreed with them. I could not consider calling and saying “hey, listen now you have to pay 80 eur more on accommodation for next week”. It was just a no question. I prayed for a solution. I considered all possible options, and would have been willing to pay that compensation from my own pocket. Fortunately (or unfortunately?) my pockets are almost empty, so I had to come up with a way to make it all work out well, for everyone, not only for me. I don’t like nasty people who leave you hanging or just quit at the moment it gets challenging, and I definitely didn’t want to be that person!
So I didn’t sleep, and I prayed, and I worried.. (this last thing didn’t help definitely!)
I followed Yogijis advice, and my heart, and wrote a very honest and respectful letter, just as I would like to receive from someone in the same situation. I empathized with all the players in the game. And I diplomatically and courageously wrote my heart out. What was new to me, breaking my usual (bad) habit, was that I specifically and clearly asked for what I wanted / needed. I tend to be one who postpones direct demands, which usually lead me nowhere or into an imbalance, having to give more than the other party (e.g I was willing to put 800 eur from my own money to just save the boat, let alone receiving any money for my work).
I stated my demand in a loving yet clear way.
And no answer came.
I got more scared.
I waited.
And prayed.
And ran around the house trying to become neutral.
So I went to Guru Sahib, and made an ardas (prayer).
I bowed, and took a hukam (a message to follow, I asked for something easy to understand for my poor head)
And just as I was reading it, Theo woke up.
I didn’t get to read the English translation, which my mind longed for guidance!
So I’m in bed, breastfeeding Theo back to sleep.
And continued reading the hukam in my phone (luckily before I ran out I looked at the page number).
And these parts stroke my bells:

“Serve the True Guru fearlessly, and your doubt shall be dispelled.

Do that work which the True Guru asks you to do.

Go to the Gate of Truth, and speak the Truth”

So in this situation, this meant to start calling everybody and tell the whole story, so they would decide whether or not to continue and put in some more money for their expenses. Wow, that sounded like a very nasty job, (to be done fearlessly!) but truth was on my side. So I took this command and bowed to it.
If that is what I’m supposed to do, then I’ll do it. Thank you.
Peace came into my being, a peace full of responsibility.
And I receive an email back from the venue.
By reading my letter they agreed to come down with their prices and meet us at a common ground, keeping their original prices. Wow!
I’m just amazed at the power of the human heart, by opening up and commiting to the end, I get this reward. I had lost hope, and kept my commitment. And I clearly stated my needs (thank you NVC!)
And I’m grateful for these people who sacrificed their earnings and time to come and meet us at common grounds.
Grateful for all the learning in this experience, may it stay with me in the future.
I make a pause, contemplate the beauty of the human soulful heart, and say:
God is great!
Blessings to each and every one.

Sukhdev Kaur
(from the bed still, Theo sleeping in my arms while I’m finishing this text on my phone)

A living prayer

I found an old post I feel the need to post it now.

This summer has been canceling after canceling one thing after the other… As if something big happening all around me was pulling me out.

It’s been an interesting journey to let go of plans and all hopes, to train myself to relax and just be. Although the mind wants to keep on driving, in reality there is no train to be running for.

So all this quitting and letting go of plans is something that needs to be done to create a vacuum, to go on with the circle of life. And to tell the truth, my mind doesn’t like to change plans or cancel commitments.
The best part is that the more goes away, the more I become centered. There has just been too much distraction to really just enjoy being at home, Being a mother.

So my intention and purpose in this life has been shifting. No more running after things, all I want is to become a living prayer. Like my mother. To elevate the vibration by just being (that doesn’t mean I don’t do anything anymore, it’s just the attitude), and to be on the moment where I am. To be, to be.

I am forever grateful to have such a wonderful mother. It was her constant prayer and devotion that has made me reach all that I have reached, that made me grow and serve. She is constantly vibrating light and love.

I can really see that the power of the mother’s prayer is a real thing and it trascends time and space, any shortcomings or temporary errors.

In gratitude, Sukhdev Kaur

Enhorabuena

Life in this world (specially with a toddler) is all about being present.
We just returned from a Family reuniting trip, and actually the whole theme I was dealing with during this journey was about staying me, staying true to my self, not getting caught up in my own mind games, relaxing my mind and just being. Today this quote from Yogiji fits perfect to close up the gained experience:

When in your life have you ever just sat down for one hour and said, “ I am going to be me, I am going to be me, I am going to be me, I’m going to be me. I’m not this. I am not that. I am me.”
When was the last time that you did your prathyahar, synchronizing yourself to zero in experience?
–© The Teachings of Yogi Bhajan, July 27, 1996

Prathyahar is the art of not feeding the senses with nonsense. It is the art of remaining zero, neutral although you are not removing yourself from the normal world. It is the art which we less practice in this world, yet the one we most need.

Blessings in light,
Sukhdev Kaur

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Departing

Dear family,
The time has arrived that departures and goodbyes approach. In our short visit to Canada, we must go back home to Estonia, and leave the family.
The heart is never ready to say goodbye. After being together with loved ones, an amalgamation occurs and we often forget about the blessing it is (we may go into everyday issues which are very unimportant). It takes time to prepare for the separation to happen, and it is painful. Any departure is a time to stop and reflect, breathe and let go. It is a small death, because something dies in us, that wholeness becomes a temporary void, which will eventually filled by life itself, in any of it’s many forms.
Life, as in it’s everyday amalgamated form, is an offering of light, a spectacle and an illusory play of balance. When the night comes, when the departures and farewells approach, we may perceive the subtlety and delicate balance of true life. It is hanging by a thread. It is very very delicate, and we notice it only in these moments of twilight and darkness.

There is a line in the Kirtan Sohila, the evening prayer of Sikh Dharma, which refers to god’s role as the destroyer of fear, this fear of separation, of being dissolved into divided parts and not belonging to the one:

kaisee aartee ho-ay. bhav khandnaa tayree aartee.
What a beautiful Aartee, lamp-lit worship service this is! O Destroyer of Fear, this is Your Ceremony of Light.

anhataa sabad vaajant bhayree. ||1|| rahaa-o.
The Unstruck Sound-current of the Shabad is the vibration of the temple drums.

The aartee, the true worship of lights and lamps, is the whole creation, not the ritual itself with which we often become entangled, nor the illusion of shine and bliss that comes from the light itself.

Let the abyss grow to swallow our fears and may god carry us across the world ocean in a graceful way.

Blessings to each and every soul part of this great maha atma.

In humble gratitude to the one.
Sukhdev Kaur

Parent’s ongoing tests

This post is mostly a reminder to myself, that I share with you all as it may be of help. I’m on holidays with my family visiting my sister and her family, and Theo seems to be uninterested to see more than our rented house. He’s been I’ll for half of the trip and now that he got well, his mood swings remind me of teething times since he only wants to be in my arms and carried, otherwise he cries (he also does it all the time in my arms though). I came to understand again that it is transitions that make him anxious, all transitions (night-day, awake-asleep, inside-outside, eating-playing, mama-papa)

So..

Children will repeatedly test your resistance, patience, love-ability and compassion. All moments when you think “I can’t handle this anymore” they will challenge you for more. The test is to lose all hope, not to become hopeless but to stop hoping and wishing and dreaming and come back to the present. That is where life with children is lived, one day at a time, one moment, whether precious or challenging, you decide the outcome. It’s all about how strong your nervous system is -not to ignore all cries!- but to be strong enough so you keep yourself anchored and centered through all cries. Because that’s the only way to help a child in whatever need they might have. Stay centered and focused. Remain you. Do not go into the mind’s game. Stay and breathe. Be you. Do not collapse, explode, burn or melt. You are his anchor, you must remain anchored. Keep up. Sa ta na ma.

(I’ll probably take some words from this and put them up the wall back at home)

Blessings from Canada
Sukhdev Kaur

My prayer through challenges

When there are challenging times, it’s always an opportunity to grow, to learn.
I’ve noticed that some of these times are usually transitions- those are the experiences we humans fear, for the uncertainty of what lies on the other side is too big to comprehend. Events of transition are birth and death, accidents, changes, twilight hours, falling asleep and waking up, and in children also growth spurts. Usually we feel uncomfortable with transitions. We don’t know how to act or behave, and when we are the ones supporting another who is going through a transition, we often lack the big picture, since we are too focused on our own internal process, which may include very strong emotions such as fear or anxiety.
To bring this down, Theo is having a growth spurt and at the same time I am going through some shaky times myself. He’s having it hard and I’m not at the moment the most centered person myself. Since sometimes my patience is short, and this is not helpful because he can sense my despair immediately, all I can do (for I can’t do anything really) is place a prayer. Make this prayer be bigger than me, bigger than this moment or situation. In tonight’s case, make this prayer of having infinite patience to hold him (and comfort him) all the way through and keep cool while doing it. This prayer will serve as my anchor, when I start to lose it, I refocus on this prayer again. Because I become powerless and let go of control, I can come across this ocean.
My prayer is now that we can keep the consciousness and the spirit through all tests in life.
Blessed be thy challenge
In humility,
Sukhdev Kaur

Few words on children’s high sensitivity

Theo has this fantastic ability to find my breast at night. He is half asleep, it is dark and he doesn’t even open his eyes -and yet without much effort, he knows where to turn his head to.
When we are born, we humans have a great sensitivity in all levels and spheres. You have probably seen how dogs and other animals sense things with their nose, well humans we also have this (as Theo shows me every night) but as grown ups we have lost this (and all the others) sensitivity.
In this Aquarian age, children are born with a fantastically evolved and subtle sensitivity. This is why we must – as parents and guides – learn to tune into that sensitivity and remain stable and calm, being conscious in his to guide them (this is first of all a reminder to myself).
For this thank god we have Yogi Bhajans teachings, he gave us a meditation to cope with our children. You can find it in Bachitar’s and my new website dealing with Conscious Parenting: http://www.consciousparenting.eu

Reporting with gratitude from the mothers lap,
Sukhdev Kaur

What breastfeeding does to mothers

Many times I have left unwritten blog entries since I tend to think they must be completely perfect and clear in order to be posted. Numerologically I have 9s and 10s, which lead this tendency to be over perfectionist, aim high (sometimes too high) and want to see the whole picture. Well, today I decide to just write some thoughts in their raw form, and quickly after join Theo in his nap…

Breastfeeding. Been doing it on demand for over a year. Love it and hate it, 99% of the times love it, and sometimes I feel trapped. It’s all ok.

I remember the very first moment Theo took my breast was like a moment of ecstasy. I expressed colostrum the first day at the hospital since he was too weak to breastfeed (longer story) and when I did take him to the breast, it was absolutely ecstatic, I could feel my pituitary having a feast, all blood and nerves joining the party.

After all this time, the party feeling is not so present always, but the implications breastfeeding has on the mothers psyche are still there (note that not all are only at the moment baby -or toddler- is at the breast, some are just 24/7!)

– pituitary releases oxytocin, the hormone of love, which makes you feel calm, happy (and sleepy!)
– you are constantly in a dream-like state, not really fully out there or outgoing, which can irritate others or productivity at work or rational matters (just ask my husband…)
– your sadhana (spiritual discipline) is there with your child, all those hours he is at the breast, instead of trying to escape (by visiting Facebook, for the 10th time…) you can focus on being, then and there, just being, not doing (ironically, I’m writing this on my phone while theo falls asleep at the breast 🙂
– all previous practice you have done, chanting mantras, etc, comes useful at the time of breastfeeding. I don’t know what it would be of me if I didn’t know japji, sopurkh, poota mata, kirtan soheela by heart… I do them while my other sadhana (the taking a shower, making breakfast, cleaning, cleaning, and tidying up the house again and again).. Any mantra that comes to mind is useful.
– being emotional.. Comes with the package. And we must remember that breastfeeding releases the lactocin (did I remember correctly?) which is the hormone of empathy. So besides being overly sensitive to the environment (ladies- no war movies or bloody stories!) your sense of empathy is much higher… So you will feel for the other in a very personal and deep way.
– be patient with others. Not everybody has such a sweet cocktail sunning in their circulation (thanks to Teet for reminding me of this one… Often…)
– if you feel you need to crack down and cry, let go and find a strong shoulder (again husband comes in handy. Or good girlfriend, or your sister or mother if they are on te same continent…)
– breathe and eat as healthy as possible. The breath can actually save you if you have a diet like mine, no time to prepare fancy things… If you breathe and expand your lungs enough (try 1-minute breath, inhale during 20 sec, hold 20 sec, exhale during 20 sec) you will have the prana needed to keep up with your baby or toddler. As for the food, I found the solution to include as many superfoods as I can to my diet (and lots of vitamins, eg B group for the nervous system, D for the bones, and include something for the immune system such as grapeseed extract!)
– keep up! If you feel like you are alone and no one supports you (everyone wants things from you but nobody recharges you), find a fountain of blessings which will always recharge you, a touchstone which you can bow to and give away all your worries, an altar in which to deposit everything and let god and guru take care of it.

Now, I join Theo in the land of dreams… If he doesn’t wake up when I cocoon around him 🙂

Love and blessings!
Sukhdev k

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(yes, he prefers the strawberry flavor of my left breast..)