Tag Archives: love

Few thoughts on parenting and legacy

It’s been a while since my last post here. The everyday life of a mother has sucked up all my time and energy, being in the moment and taking a break from overdoing too much other things. Today I really feel like writing. Theo recently turned 5 months old, and as I write this he is behind me sleeping soundly (beautifully and peacefully).

Many thoughts have been today going through my mind. Recently we bought Theo a new (and light!) stroller, which I must say is more of a comfort to me than bringing him happiness. He loves being carried and being in arms, as all small babies should. And today I went back to the rebozo (carrying sling). It was a good experience- one of those when I came back home sweaty, tired, in a bad mood. He was sound asleep and happy, but not much difference than those times with the stroller. To me it was. He has grown big and heavy, and the sling is not any more a first choice for long journeys in the city. For home use its great, but the time has gone when we were tied together 24-7. It was a small thing, but a strong realisation of how he is growing, and me giving in into al sorts of imagined ideas of how I want to raise him. I give up, my body just doesn’t allow for such perfectionism (my 9’s talking here).

I can see a difference those days when we use the stroller a lot. He becomes (the difference is subtle and slight) more isolated, slightly more irritable and needs more entertainment. Yet I realised today, that in spite of being aware of that, I just cannot physically give him 24-7 hours of body contact anymore. The long uncertain nights have given way to more routine and peaceful days and nights, which is such a relief for me as well. Also, he does not ask for the 24-7 carrying, and is happy playing alone for a while.

Life in this point is so full of moments of awareness. My own cells bring the traditions from my mexican ancestors, yet Theo also has qualities from these northern peoples. I can see both sides in his personality in development.

Another thought today caught my attention: What is the most important thing that I would like to give my child? That means, if I would be gone tomorrow, what would I like it to be my legacy to him (and the others yet to come)? It would need to be something bigger than me, a connection with the divine, an understanding of this play we are all in (maya), and the link to God through Guru. Thats it. The only thought, knowledge and experience of being part of the play of something bigger is what I want to give him- so he will not be dissapointed by the time when he realises that mama and papa are not perfect, or that his mates are also not perfect, or that even he is not perfect. The experience that he can always lean on Guru for answers, for hope, for uplifting and elevating himself and others. And of course, the core of the teachings that is, live for the other. No matter in how many problems or situations I might be stuck today, the sole thought of helping another makes it all senseless. Live for each other, said Yogiji. Thats it. It makes life easy, smooth, relaxing. And of course, gratitude for all.

I am grateful that my child came into my world by the time I have this depth in understanding. Thats probably what I was so afraid of when thinking of having children years ago. I was not consciously mature. But now I have these teachings to give him, and serving the sangat while doing so, is the most divine gift that god has given me. Obey, serve, love, excel. Humility, service, compassion and realisation. The teachings of Guruji, the way to live in this world to walk light and in light. If it was not for elevating others, there would be no purpose in this life at all. Serving humanity to the very last breath in this world. Sharing the technology, the teachings of consciousness. Being a bridge- serving others find the divine in themselves, that is the only thing why I came into this life, and that is what I want to give to my Theo. That is my teaching to him. All other is just icing.

karam kriya nädalavahetus

Tee numbritega tutvust.

Numbrid ümbritsevad meid kõikjal – kogu universum põhineb ju numbritel. Mida numbrid kaasa toovad? Kuidas arendada välja keel numbritega suhtlemiseks= Kuidas numbritega muuta oma elu?

“Teekond peast südamesse”

Sissejuhatus Karam Kriyasse / Teadlikkus numbritest
09-10 juuli 2011, kl 10-18 Tallinnas, Budakojas (Luha tn 1)

Tule liitu Hari Krishan Singhiga teekonnal peast südamesse, mille teejuht on numbrite universaalne keel.

Karam Kriya ehk rakenduslik numeroloogia tegeleb numbrite nö „viimase keelega“, mis võimaldab meil ületada näiline reaalsus ning kuulata alati kõikjal olevat Tõde, mis ilmneb igapäevaselt meie suhetes ja ümbruskonnas. Töötame viie keelega: maagia, meditsiin, teadus, kunst ja haridus. Karam Kriya on teadlikult loodud ruum, kus numbrid kõnelevad igavikulist Tõde.

Numbid on viimane abstraktsioon enne kõik-on-üks olemist ja seetõttu ka üks viimaseid samme mõistmaks kosmilise kanga mustrit. Kommunikatsioonis me tunnistame nelja järgnevat avardumist, mis võivad tervendada blokeeringuid, pahelisi mustreid ja mis iganes takistusi, et kogeda selgust oma suhetes. Kaasame loomaliku, inimliku ja ingelliku aspekti ning loome sideme personaalse ja universaalse vahel sinu elus.

Karam kriya numeroloogia jätkukoolitus (november 2011-oktoober 2012) õpetab, kuidas teha tööd numbrite maailmaga.

Hari Krishan Singh (Nederlands)
Hari Krishanist sai 2003 aastal Shiv Charan Singhi õpilane ning õpib tema käe all siiani. Teda on õnnistatud olema Karam Kriya asutaja Hollandis, ta on Karam Kriya õpetaja ja konsultant ning ühtlasi koolitab tulevasi kundalini jooga õpetajaid. “Numbrid on mu elus alati aktiivselt kohal. Mul on suur au õpetada Karam Kriya koolkonnas ja au läbi viia seda koolitust Eestis“.

KURSUSE MAKSMUS:
Mõlemad päevad 145 eur. Soodushinnaga 125 eur kui registreerid enne 01.07.2011
Osalemine ühel päeval 85 eur.
Osalemiseks on vajalik eelnev registreerimine meiliaadressil sukhdevkaur@khalsa.com , ja
tagastamatu ettemaksu 50 EUR tasumine hiljemalt 01.07.2011 Urban Dharma OÜ 10220090076018 selgitus “kk intro” Ülejäänud summa tasumine kohapeal (kui arve on vaja, sellele lisandub KM)
Kursus tõlgitakse inglise keelest eesti keelde

http://www.karamkriya.ee


karam kriya nädalavahetus

Tee numbritega tutvust.

Numbrid ümbritsevad meid kõikjal – kogu universum põhineb ju numbritel. Mida numbrid kaasa toovad? Kuidas arendada välja keel numbritega suhtlemiseks= Kuidas numbritega muuta oma elu?

“Teekond peast südamesse”

Sissejuhatus Karam Kriyasse / Teadlikkus numbritest
09-10 juuli 2011, kl 10-18 Tallinnas, Budakojas (Luha tn 1)

Tule liitu Hari Krishan Singhiga teekonnal peast südamesse, mille teejuht on numbrite universaalne keel.

Karam Kriya ehk rakenduslik numeroloogia tegeleb numbrite nö „viimase keelega“, mis võimaldab meil ületada näiline reaalsus ning kuulata alati kõikjal olevat Tõde, mis ilmneb igapäevaselt meie suhetes ja ümbruskonnas. Töötame viie keelega: maagia, meditsiin, teadus, kunst ja haridus. Karam Kriya on teadlikult loodud ruum, kus numbrid kõnelevad igavikulist Tõde.

Numbid on viimane abstraktsioon enne kõik-on-üks olemist ja seetõttu ka üks viimaseid samme mõistmaks kosmilise kanga mustrit. Kommunikatsioonis me tunnistame nelja järgnevat avardumist, mis võivad tervendada blokeeringuid, pahelisi mustreid ja mis iganes takistusi, et kogeda selgust oma suhetes. Kaasame loomaliku, inimliku ja ingelliku aspekti ning loome sideme personaalse ja universaalse vahel sinu elus.

Karam kriya numeroloogia jätkukoolitus (november 2011-oktoober 2012) õpetab, kuidas teha tööd numbrite maailmaga.

Hari Krishan Singh (Nederlands)
Hari Krishanist sai 2003 aastal Shiv Charan Singhi õpilane ning õpib tema käe all siiani. Teda on õnnistatud olema Karam Kriya asutaja Hollandis, ta on Karam Kriya õpetaja ja konsultant ning ühtlasi koolitab tulevasi kundalini jooga õpetajaid. “Numbrid on mu elus alati aktiivselt kohal. Mul on suur au õpetada Karam Kriya koolkonnas ja au läbi viia seda koolitust Eestis“.

KURSUSE MAKSMUS:
Mõlemad päevad 145 eur. Soodushinnaga 125 eur kui registreerid enne 01.07.2011
Osalemine ühel päeval 85 eur.
Osalemiseks on vajalik eelnev registreerimine meiliaadressil sukhdevkaur@khalsa.com , ja
tagastamatu ettemaksu 50 EUR tasumine hiljemalt 01.07.2011 Urban Dharma OÜ 10220090076018 selgitus “kk intro” Ülejäänud summa tasumine kohapeal (kui arve on vaja, sellele lisandub KM)
Kursus tõlgitakse inglise keelest eesti keelde

http://www.karamkriya.ee


The things I learnt from my 40 days after birth

– Accepting that my child came to this world to learn something (even though I don’t know what it is) and that he has his own karma (which is partly also my karma). All that happens during birth and the first fourty days after birth (eg unexpected changes in plans, complications) is part of that higher plan in which we all fit in, although we don’t always see it.

– The only thing that never changes is that everything changes. Although it may seem that the sleepless nights will never end, they actually will end, sooner or later.

– It is unbelievable how flexible the human body, mind and heart can be. Allow yourself the flexibility to become a mother. I never would have imagined before that I could sleep in such strange and seemingly uncomfortable positions such as the ones I sleep in when Theo wants to sleep on top of me. And I did manage to sleep in such positions. Get someone to do a massage to recover from such events.

– Accept help from loved ones. I would not have managed to come out happily and easily out from the exhaustion of birth and postpartum without the great help from my parents. If it is cooking you a nice meal, rocking the baby while you take a nap, or even changing a diaper, bringing some food from the shop. From my mother I got great emotional and spiritual help and support with all kinds of new-mother’s questions.

– Trust your intuition. At first I thought that intuition would just be there or come instantly on the first cry of the baby, but I realised that it is something that builds up, that you learn together with your baby. It comes with listening to his needs, to your heart and to experiences. With each day I learnt something new and listening to what my baby wanted in an ethereal way. Trust that intuition, if you feel that this is what your baby is telling you he needs, then go for it. All others might say other things but YOU are the mother and your link with your child is infinite, beyond this world, indescribable. You don’t need to explain why and how you feel this is what your baby needs, just trust that feeling.

– Give yourself a moment each day, to be with yourself and meditate, stretch, breathe or at least enjoy a warm shower (for this you need the support of your husband or a loved one who takes care of the baby)

– Patience, patience, patience. And more patience. In the learning of anything new, you need to be attentive and listen, and have patience with your baby, with your partner, with yourself. Having a baby is a whole new yoga – union – and as any new yogas, you start from scratch and you need to build up on experience. Keep in mind always that union and that connection with the infinite which is beyond this world. In those long sleepless nights of the beginning, when there was no more hope to get sleep and patience was scarce, I thought  to myself (and to my baby) something like this “patience is nothing that I can run out of, since I have no patience, patience has me and it is endless”. For this, a great support was the affirmation by Yogi Bhajan “patience pays”. (words and affirmation here)

– See the big picture. This is a hard one. As a new mother, your baby draws you into a very small picture, which is only the space between you and him (usually, and ideally, only a few centimeters or not even that if you are often skin-to-skin). When it gets hard, like when your child is crying inconsolably at night because of colic, and you feel you cannot do anything (you have probably already tried everything), just open your heart, thank your child for crying and communicating (and thank god for giving your child lungs and the strength to cry), and open the space to uphold your child and his cry within your heart. It will soon be over (and if its not then there might be something more than just colic so check that) and your child will be off stress and sleeping soundly. Sometimes crying is needed (although every time Theo cries my heart shrinks to the size of a raisin). Seeing the big picture also implies understanding with the mind that these times will pass, so you might as well enjoy it. And it also means that there is a reason for everything – even your not understanding why he is crying or why he is not sleeping or eating as usual. Your baby is a human like you and me – somedays you are more hungry than others, some days in a bad mood. Just keep an open heart to accepting everything and not expecting anything in advance. Your child knows what he needs – trust that beyond anything others might say.

– Enjoy every moment. Everyone has heard stories of mothers who stay staring at their babies all the time, and accordingly melt to that vision. Allow yourself to fall in love with your child again and again. It is nature’s way of making sure everything is taken care of for our little ones, and to remind us that there are greater things in this world than we can ever think of with our functional brain.

– Allow yourself to shut down from the outside world. Even reading an email in the first days after birth was hard. No brain, no thinking was easy. Let someone else take care of the rational things, give yourself the time to be only with your baby and mind only baby business. 40 days in your life without having to worry about other things is such a short time after all.

– Learn from each other. Your child communicates with you every moment. Allow him the opportunity to communicate with you, and listen attentively. Listen to his changing needs, every day you can discover something new, in this amazingly quickly growing moment of his life. This is the time when he will change the most, grow the most and he needs the most support from you. Be with him, carry him as much as possible, protect and provide all he needs. Give him the security and strength you want him to have all his life, if you do this now he will have it forever. He will be self-confident, and I see that already after the 40 days, my baby who before wanted to be in my arms all the time, now he needs and demands his space and solitude for some times of the day. He can rest from his mother for a while, and he needs that space, already now.

– Relax. Every new mother wants to do everything perfectly. You are the perfect mother already, you don’t need to become it. I got into a lot of stress trying to do everything “right”, and after some hard lessons I realised that everything I do will be right for my child when I do it consciously. I cannot protect him from everything in this life, I can only do my best, and let God do the rest. If there are flaws in your partner, in your home, in yourself and in your day, it is fine. Just trust the infinite and relax. If a mother is stressed, the whole family and home is in stress. If you are happy, relaxed and centered in yourself, the home will be like that. Treat yourself and others kindly.

– Don’t think too much. It can damage your relationship with your partner, put you under lots of stress. Better just focus on your intuition and shut down your brain. In its due time, your brain can be re-awakened. Just focus on loving and providing all for your child, and love all, be compassionate to all (including yourself).

 

Honouring birth

Darkness, or almost, and . . . silence. 
A profound peace settles in the room.
You can feel the respect which naturally
attends the arrival of a baby.
One doesn’t shout in a church.
One spontaneously lowers one’s voice.
If there is such a thing as a sanctified place, surely
it is the room the child is about to enter.

– Frederick Leboyer, quote from the book Birth Without Violence, read the whole book here