to all the mothers: on departures and longing

to all the mothers,

some long gone but never lost in our memories,
some living in the everyday rush of taking care of their kids,
some living far away from their grown up children, watching them uncurl their own lives,
some who have lost their ones, but remain mothers forever,
some who are young and not yet mothers, but already girls and women who have the inborn maternal instinct in their hearts,
and one who is mother of all, mother earth, Adi Shakti, the primal women energy who created this universe.

The love and the prayer of the mother is one of the purest and most powerful energies in the world. In the womb, it can totally transform the soul of the baby to come, and in life it can bless its grown-up children with a blissful and loving future. There is no time, no space and no limits for the love and the blessings of a mother. I sometimes think that I must have prayed too much when I was pregnant, for I achieved one of the purest souls in the planet to live through me.

Yesterday I read one very beautiful quote by Yogi Bhajan:

“I believe it takes only one woman and one birth to change the whole planet. All it takes is one woman to create one consciousness equal to Guru Nanak or Christ or Buddha. Guru Nanak came out of a woman. Jesus came out of Mary; Krishna, Buddha, everybody, including me, came out of a woman. Therefore, I honestly believe that it is the glory of the woman that spreads the light on this earth.” -Yogi Bhajan

Today, I sit behind the computer with Orkita (my cat) on my lap, while Teedu sits in the ferry on his way to Finland. Yet another departure, once more alone.

Everybody says (including me!) that nobody is never alone, that even though he and Vida are not here physically, I am not alone. They are absolutely right, yet the physical and psychical feeling of something leaving, and a hole, is very much real. And I used to think that “I shouldnt feel like this” but not anymore. It is OK to feel like this, it is only human and it reminds of the human experience that we, as spiritual beings, are living in this world. Or do you think that I should be strong and spiritual and all that crap and not feel alone?

Allowing feelings and emotions arise and dissapear is a true art. The trick is not in suppressing feelings but in letting them run their natural course. Today I cried when Teet left, and though I know he is not far and he will come back soon, it is still a departure and physically it hurts. Crying is healing, and allowing the emotions to live their course is an ultimate healing. Even in the rapture of crying, I can feel the emotion but not feel attached to it. I will not die because of it. And I’ve been through enough departures to see the beauty of it, the power that love between two beings has, and the power that holds them together through time and space. In my cry, today I realised how beautiful and powerful the story of the woman waiting for her beloved is.

One of the most beautiful poems, written in over 1400 pages and in many languages interconnected, is the Siri Guru Granth Sahib. It is a living prayer, and it is very simple. It is, in simple terms, the story of the woman who is waiting for her beloved. She prepares the bed beautifully, she washes herself and puts on the most beautiful dress, she does all the things to prepare for his arrival and to serve her beloved.  She prays for his arrival, and when the beloved comes, the house is filled with joy. The union of the wife and husband is one of the most ancient and most profound stories of humanity. In the Siri Guru Granth Sahib, the story is not about a physical woman and man but it is a metaphor for the longing of the soul. The soul-bride is longing for the union with her beloved husband-god. All the story, is about the thirst that the soul has to be completed, to be united with her creator. All religions, all philosopies, all capitalism, all human wish, creation and action is driven in its purest principle from this desire of union. The husband-lord, creator, beloved and god, stand for that energy which is prior to the Adi Shakti, the female power, which is the state of bliss from beyond time-space, from the zero, from enlightement, from heaven, from paradise and whatever word is there to express that infinite joy and bliss from timeless eternity which we have all experienced beyond this physical world. But it is through the physical world and body through which we have the opportunity to achieve that union.

Longing is one of the most beautiful feelings that a human can experience, because it is the longing of the soul to be united with the creation/creator that is what drives all love.

Unconsciously consciously, I am writing in this blog more important passages of my PhD than in the “official” file. It is much more fun to write it to share in this manner. So comments are humbly welcome.

Muchos besos!

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2 thoughts on “to all the mothers: on departures and longing”

  1. linda tienes toda la razon ,las lagrimas limpian y sanan,y como tu me dijiste hace mucho lo importante es no creerte parte de la tristeza,dejarla fluir y no es parte de nosotros, me enseñas tanto cada vez que escribes,que me siento muyyyyyy orgullosa,de que lo compartas con todos los que necesitamos de tu luzzzzzzzzzz,te quiero amor mucho mucho mucho,mimmmmmm

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